Growing Experiences -- Ninetieth Post

First off, the new blogger format where you can't tab quickly from the title to the body of the post is really annoying. I don't know if I said it before, but it's worth saying again.

Second off, I just had a growing experience and hated it thoroughly. I actually had it a few months ago, but I've been too busy to post the perfectly viable draft that I wrote right after it happened. The problem with this one was the extended stress levels. I moved to another state with hotel reservations for the parents and brother for three nights; this was after graduate housing fell through (they contacted me today saying they would have a place in September; thanks a heap, Coyote Ugly). I had a few meetings set up to look at apartments, and made a lot more as the days went on and I couldn't find anything. I don't think I encountered too many craigslist scams, but I saw a few kind of awful places, didn't sleep well due to snoring in the hotel room, had a couple places get snatched out from under me, and eventually ditched the whole "my future-roommate can move in later" plan as living on the street became more of a possibility. Finally, I decided to look for rooms to let in established places; i.e., I would become a new roommate in a house full of strangers who already knew each other. As a quick recap, junior year fall was great because no one knew anyone, but junior year spring was awful because everyone but me was already established. Still, it would better than being homeless. 

I hated this growing experience. I had to make phone calls and put my phone number on the internet (via craigslist emails) and meet lots of new people. 

This clip from Despicable Me 2 sums up how I feel about making phone calls.

And, while I hate the way my stomach still hurt from the stress as I wrote this three days after moving in, I feel pretty good about this whole endeavor again. For a few weeks, I was wondering if I was even supposed to end up in grad school, given the way housing was working out (or not working out, as it were). I was so stressed that I was getting tension headaches because my stress apparently settles in my shoulders and neck. Once we started the trip over here, I started not being able to eat a whole lot; you'd be amazed by how unappealing most food is when your stomach is twisted up and you feel like you could dry heave at any point. I mean, water made my stomach hurt. Breathing made my stomach hurt. 

Anyway, I found a place where I could move in immediately with nice people, two dogs, a flight of stairs between me and the kitchen, a washer and dryer, a monthly lease (nice if things don't work out), a nearby bus stop, and the cheapest rent I've ever seen in a four-person home. It's a mere ten dollars more expensive than my last place, with its unfinished basement and six people, and almost a third of the average rent in the area. 

Bam. 

Now I'm free to stress about (in approximately this order): 

1. Orientation

2. Preliminaries (have been too busy moving and stressing to study)

3. Teaching 

4. Teaching

5. Teaching

6. Class

But hey, this is what I signed up for. If I can meet someone and move into their house the same day, well, I can teach three labs of probably-won't-be-science-majors-after-this-semester undergrads. 

Also, I bought a bike for $80 and spent almost twice that much fitting it out with fenders, lights, grips, a kickstand, and a helmet. And I still have enough money to pay rent next month. And I can pay utilities.

Once I figure out how this house works, life will be pretty good. I've already almost forgotten the bone-crushing, vomit-inducing stress that comes when you have to be out of the hotel TOMORROW and school activities start in THREE DAYS. In the meantime, I'm still working out whether or not to use the dishwasher and how long the dryer takes to finish drying my sheets so I can go to bed. It seems a lot better than worrying about where I'll be sleeping tomorrow.

UPDATE: It's been a few months since orientation now, and I can hardly remember it. I've made friends, I've make mistakes, and I've made good choices. As far as I can tell, grad school is like having a teaching job, with all that stress and work, smashed in with having serious classes in school and a part-time job in a research lab. So, like real life but more stressful.
I regret nothing. 

Graduations -- Eighty Ninth Post

Fun fact: I'm about to graduate from my undergraduate university. I have a grad school all lined up, I'm all confirmed and working on a roommate and apartment for next year, and I can safely put off loan repayments for at least five years. Because I'm in chemistry grad school, I will be paid to go to school and get my doctorate. I'll have to work my butt off to get that money, but it's better than having to work to pay tuition on top of living expenses (i.e., food, shelter). Still, graduating puts one in a strange frame of mind, regardless of whether it's high school or college (college = uni, for any UK denizens reading this). I feel like reflecting on where the hell the past four years went, all of a sudden. I feel like giving advice to anyone who looks younger than me. I feel like making jokes about common lab glassware. And, of course, I feel like blogging about it instead of doing my homework.
I also feel like all the grown-ups in my life who always make weird statements about "how fast life goes" were right all along. I mean, where did the last four years go? I had to recap them just to prove that it really has been three years and nine months since I got here.
Freshman Year: 2009-2010
Cried when my family left
Became vegetarian
Made friends on hall
Didn't really make other friends
Found out that college is hard
Discovered Heroes and became addicted
Found spiritual home in shotokan karate
Had nervous breakdown in advisor's office over physics
Was angry in class most of the time
Passed Physics 1
Took 3 lab classes at the same time
Survived taking 3 lab classes, arguably
Started realizing that personal beliefs line up remarkably well with feminism

Sophomore Year: 2010-2011
Lost touch with freshman year friends
Kept doing karate
Took Ochem and German at same time
Made new friends
Applied to study abroad
Was accepted to study abroad program
Was accepted to University of Sunderland
Didn't do much else
May have survived taking OChem and German at the same time
Gained lots of confidence from karate

Junior Year: 2011-2012
Studied abroad in England
Made lots of new friends
Did lots of new things
Pierced nose
Discovered self outside of family-and-friend network
Liked who I found
Visited and fell in love with Edinburgh
Visited and didn't enjoy London
Had computer stolen
Came back to States
Promptly took hardest undergrad course load ever and didn't have a breakdown
Was sick all the time due to rain and cold, drafty, poorly-lit house
Missed England

Senior Year: 2012-2013
Missed England
Kept friends from sophomore year
Got new job in a teaching-ish position
Loved new job, much to my surprise
Took GRE
Did okay enough on GRE to get into grad school
Took lots of really hard classes and didn't have a breakdown
Got yellow belt in karate
Applied to grad schools
Got into top choice grad school
Kept missing England
Got green belt in karate
Lost motivation for last two assignments of undergrad like you would not believe

So, okay, it really has been four years. And if you want advice for college, here is my advice to you: Everyone's experience is different. If there is one thing I would love for everyone to do, it's study abroad, but I know that it's expensive and sometimes difficult to manage with a busy course load. So go, live your life, and enjoy what comes your way. If you need fantastic grades to get into your post-graduate whatever, then try hard. If not, well, I got into grad school with a solid B average. I don't get honor cords, which is kind of depressing given that I was valedictorian in high school, but whatever. The point is, I'm done and I did my best. Do I have regrets? Sure. Would I change anything? Nothing but keeping in touch with people and remembering to clean my hair out of the shower sophomore year.

Also, I can't help but include another fun fact:
The difference between a University and a College in the States is in the graduate programs. My school is a university; another school in Eastern Washington that starts with "Whit" is a college. Ugh, get it right.

Twelfth Post

First off, I would like to point out that "twelfth" is a weird word.

Now that I've got that out of the way, we can discuss my exceptionally boring day. I went to work, which was pretty boring, and then I learned that high schoolers and university students move differently. (Quick background note- my university partners with a programme for minorities in poor high schools so that they have a better view of science and math. This includes the high schoolers visiting the science building and doing labs set up by university students.) I was calmly wasting some time at the drinking fountain when I heard the thunder of feet coming around the corner. High schoolers move in packs. I remember this from my own school, when getting into and out of the hall was a tricky proposition because of how tightly they stick together.

University students move as their own particles. They are not really influenced by the other thousands of people moving with them in the same approximate direction. I like this fact of life. I do not like stampeding hoards of high schoolers invading my nice, quiet sojourn at the drinking fountain. So my life was not boring at that moment... Just terrifying. This is why I prefer boring.

I have also been half-asleep since 15:00. I nearly fell asleep in class, and then I've just been completely out of touch with what other people are trying to say. I perhaps should have taken my roommate's advice sooner than I did.