Fun fact: I'm about to graduate from my undergraduate university. I have a grad school all lined up, I'm all confirmed and working on a roommate and apartment for next year, and I can safely put off loan repayments for at least five years. Because I'm in chemistry grad school, I will be paid to go to school and get my doctorate. I'll have to work my butt off to get that money, but it's better than having to work to pay tuition on top of living expenses (i.e., food, shelter). Still, graduating puts one in a strange frame of mind, regardless of whether it's high school or college (college = uni, for any UK denizens reading this). I feel like reflecting on where the hell the past four years went, all of a sudden. I feel like giving advice to anyone who looks younger than me. I feel like making jokes about common lab glassware. And, of course, I feel like blogging about it instead of doing my homework.
I also feel like all the grown-ups in my life who always make weird statements about "how fast life goes" were right all along. I mean, where did the last four years go? I had to recap them just to prove that it really has been three years and nine months since I got here.
Freshman Year: 2009-2010
Cried when my family left
Became vegetarian
Made friends on hall
Didn't really make other friends
Found out that college is hard
Discovered Heroes and became addicted
Found spiritual home in shotokan karate
Had nervous breakdown in advisor's office over physics
Was angry in class most of the time
Passed Physics 1
Took 3 lab classes at the same time
Survived taking 3 lab classes, arguably
Started realizing that personal beliefs line up remarkably well with feminism
Sophomore Year: 2010-2011
Lost touch with freshman year friends
Kept doing karate
Took Ochem and German at same time
Made new friends
Applied to study abroad
Was accepted to study abroad program
Was accepted to University of Sunderland
Didn't do much else
May have survived taking OChem and German at the same time
Gained lots of confidence from karate
Junior Year: 2011-2012
Studied abroad in England
Made lots of new friends
Did lots of new things
Pierced nose
Discovered self outside of family-and-friend network
Liked who I found
Visited and fell in love with Edinburgh
Visited and didn't enjoy London
Had computer stolen
Came back to States
Promptly took hardest undergrad course load ever and didn't have a breakdown
Was sick all the time due to rain and cold, drafty, poorly-lit house
Missed England
Senior Year: 2012-2013
Missed England
Kept friends from sophomore year
Got new job in a teaching-ish position
Loved new job, much to my surprise
Took GRE
Did okay enough on GRE to get into grad school
Took lots of really hard classes and didn't have a breakdown
Got yellow belt in karate
Applied to grad schools
Got into top choice grad school
Kept missing England
Got green belt in karate
Lost motivation for last two assignments of undergrad like you would not believe
So, okay, it really has been four years. And if you want advice for college, here is my advice to you: Everyone's experience is different. If there is one thing I would love for everyone to do, it's study abroad, but I know that it's expensive and sometimes difficult to manage with a busy course load. So go, live your life, and enjoy what comes your way. If you need fantastic grades to get into your post-graduate whatever, then try hard. If not, well, I got into grad school with a solid B average. I don't get honor cords, which is kind of depressing given that I was valedictorian in high school, but whatever. The point is, I'm done and I did my best. Do I have regrets? Sure. Would I change anything? Nothing but keeping in touch with people and remembering to clean my hair out of the shower sophomore year.
Also, I can't help but include another fun fact:
The difference between a University and a College in the States is in the graduate programs. My school is a university; another school in Eastern Washington that starts with "Whit" is a college. Ugh, get it right.
Showing posts with label missing Sunderland. Show all posts
Showing posts with label missing Sunderland. Show all posts
10 May 2013
29 March 2012
Back in the States
I've been back in the states for a few months now, and I'm really starting to get the reverse culture shock (whenever I have the time to think about something that isn't upper-division chemistry or speeches that I have to write and deliver, which isn't often; American uni is harder than British uni). I find myself walking down the street missing Sunderland, of all places (I had a distinct day where I hated the whole place down to the paving stones), missing pasties, missing people being able to pronounce pasties without sounding oddly profane... I miss people who say "to-mah-to" instead of "to-may-to", and I miss how oddly uncomplicated life is when you're living with people with whom you share no history.
I miss the days of the only drama in my friend group being that my roommate was being a bitch about something stupid or eating other people's food (I strongly suspect her of eating an entire half-package of soft cheese the weekend I went to Liverpool, and I was only gone for a night). Back here, one of my friends is turning uni back into high school, with her complicated, dramatic view of how friendship should work.
Here, for your viewing pleasure and also my personal ability to understand my life, is something of a schematic of why I miss my England friends:
Linear Complex Bio Major: is attempting to reinstate the clique mentality of american secondary school. Is not really speaking to High Valence Biochem Major. Fancies Unfortunate Biochem Boy. Bosses Distressingly Unknown Accountant and Myself as much as possible. Sees all decisions made by anyone in friend group as involving whole group; has a strong "we" mentality. Is enormously frustrated by single-ness; this manifests itself in her scaring off any friendly boys, much to her continued and compounded frustration.
Octahedral Biochem Major: has a much looser view of friendship. Is best friends with Unfortunate Biochem Boy. Is not really speaking to Linear Bio Major. Gets along fine and does not try to boss Myself or Distressingly Unknown Accountant, although she does tend to bulldoze the planning. Still, allows friends to be otherwise engaged without being offended.
Unfortunate Biochem Boy: is male. Is also most eligible junior science major bachelor who is determined to remain a bachelor. Does not fancy Linear Bio Major back; may or may not suspect that she fancies him. Is sometimes clueless about why the females that surround him are angry. Is a decent lab partner and generally decent friend in spite of some core dickishness, as revealed by conversations between Myself and Octahedral Biochem Major.
Distressingly Unknown Accountant: tries to avoid making decisions. Ends up being a bit of a pawn. Like Myself in this way, just times twenty thousand. Personal thoughts are largely unknown, but often professed to be known by Linear Complex Bio Major and English Major, her roommate.
English Major: is generally nice and sweet and a generally good friend. Lent Myself $20 and has not asked for it over the past month (guilt). Tends to follow Linear Complex Bio Major's theory of making decisions for others via the "we" groupthink. Tends to boss Distressingly Unknown Accountant, her roommate.
Myself: is pissed at the drama created by Linear Complex Bio Major and Octahedral Biochem Major's clashing. Misses simplicity found in England. May or may not fancy Unfortunate Biochem Boy; is flat-out determined not to actively pursue him. Is lab partners with Unfortunate Biochem Boy, wherein a reasonably good friendship has sprung up. Feels that, aside from not being awfully ready to pursue a relationship due to a need to figure out self first, most relationships that seem attractive would cause awkward tensions.
So. The main thing that's been unfortunately camping out in my thoughts is that, in England, relationships, even non-platonic ones, were socially simple. Logistically, not so much, but one could hook up with a guy without worrying about offending two of one's closest friends. Sure, the guy in question was my dearest England friend's boyfriend's best friend, but that was all we had in common.
In the unlikely event that Unfortunate Biochem Boy asks me out, I will have alienated Linear Complex Bio Major, who would see not using my influence with him to nudge him towards herself as the deepest form of betrayal. She will in turn take it upon herself to alienate me from Distressingly Unknown Accountant, which will likely also alienate me from English Major. Also, since he is besties with Octahedral Biochem Major, that relationship might be strained. They talk about everything, which would not bother me in the slightest, since I understand the relationship, but I wouldn't want to harm their friendship. If Unfortunate Biochem Boy stopped being as close to Octahedral Biochem Major, I would feel really bad. Although it's not likely to be a problem, the implications loom over me like an upcoming doctor's appointment. They probably won't find anything horribly wrong, but what if they do? So I stress.
See? See what happens when people get histories? Much better when the only thing shared by all parties is the fact that they live in the same flat, or know people who live in that flat.
Other things that I miss are the smell of british tobacco smoke (which is emitted by tabs, not cigarettes or the hookah that stunk up my whole house tonight, and is generally smelled when hanging out with my British friend), pizza places, chips, pasties again, public transport, and the lack of daytime rain. The close proximity of grocery stores like Aldi (where real food could be purchased for £1, or less than $2) and the fifty million news agents, supermarkets, and fruit and veg stands that populated the three blocks surrounding my flat are also sorely missed. I have to walk ten minutes up hills to get even to a (british-type) supermarket, found in the states as convenience stores attached to gas stations. These walks are not associated with any sort of commute. The cheapest grocery store is also the furthest away, of course.
I also miss drinking and dancing. Parties big enough to have drinking games are full of strangers that only want to play pong and who don't want to dance and parties small enough to want to play drinking games are populated by non-beer-drinkers. I miss the casual drinking, where you know that someone has got your back, even if they're just as drunk as you, and they won't leave you at the club. I miss the siren songs of dubstep and rave music pounding through my body as I relax in the anonymity of a club and allow my body to thrash around, not really caring if I can match the rhythm of the music or the person next to me.
I'll be investing in air freshener to ward off any hookah stink that might make its way into my room (although keeping my door shut has done wonders so far tonight) and possibly also investigating the potential of Richmond cigarettes, the smell of which I didn't mind in England and which I rather miss, although I'd need to be stealthy and not get addicted or make my clothes stink of the smoke. That being said, I probably won't. I'm spending most of my disposable income, of which there really is none, on food and booze lately.
I miss the days of the only drama in my friend group being that my roommate was being a bitch about something stupid or eating other people's food (I strongly suspect her of eating an entire half-package of soft cheese the weekend I went to Liverpool, and I was only gone for a night). Back here, one of my friends is turning uni back into high school, with her complicated, dramatic view of how friendship should work.
Here, for your viewing pleasure and also my personal ability to understand my life, is something of a schematic of why I miss my England friends:
Linear Complex Bio Major: is attempting to reinstate the clique mentality of american secondary school. Is not really speaking to High Valence Biochem Major. Fancies Unfortunate Biochem Boy. Bosses Distressingly Unknown Accountant and Myself as much as possible. Sees all decisions made by anyone in friend group as involving whole group; has a strong "we" mentality. Is enormously frustrated by single-ness; this manifests itself in her scaring off any friendly boys, much to her continued and compounded frustration.
Octahedral Biochem Major: has a much looser view of friendship. Is best friends with Unfortunate Biochem Boy. Is not really speaking to Linear Bio Major. Gets along fine and does not try to boss Myself or Distressingly Unknown Accountant, although she does tend to bulldoze the planning. Still, allows friends to be otherwise engaged without being offended.
Unfortunate Biochem Boy: is male. Is also most eligible junior science major bachelor who is determined to remain a bachelor. Does not fancy Linear Bio Major back; may or may not suspect that she fancies him. Is sometimes clueless about why the females that surround him are angry. Is a decent lab partner and generally decent friend in spite of some core dickishness, as revealed by conversations between Myself and Octahedral Biochem Major.
Distressingly Unknown Accountant: tries to avoid making decisions. Ends up being a bit of a pawn. Like Myself in this way, just times twenty thousand. Personal thoughts are largely unknown, but often professed to be known by Linear Complex Bio Major and English Major, her roommate.
English Major: is generally nice and sweet and a generally good friend. Lent Myself $20 and has not asked for it over the past month (guilt). Tends to follow Linear Complex Bio Major's theory of making decisions for others via the "we" groupthink. Tends to boss Distressingly Unknown Accountant, her roommate.
Myself: is pissed at the drama created by Linear Complex Bio Major and Octahedral Biochem Major's clashing. Misses simplicity found in England. May or may not fancy Unfortunate Biochem Boy; is flat-out determined not to actively pursue him. Is lab partners with Unfortunate Biochem Boy, wherein a reasonably good friendship has sprung up. Feels that, aside from not being awfully ready to pursue a relationship due to a need to figure out self first, most relationships that seem attractive would cause awkward tensions.
So. The main thing that's been unfortunately camping out in my thoughts is that, in England, relationships, even non-platonic ones, were socially simple. Logistically, not so much, but one could hook up with a guy without worrying about offending two of one's closest friends. Sure, the guy in question was my dearest England friend's boyfriend's best friend, but that was all we had in common.
In the unlikely event that Unfortunate Biochem Boy asks me out, I will have alienated Linear Complex Bio Major, who would see not using my influence with him to nudge him towards herself as the deepest form of betrayal. She will in turn take it upon herself to alienate me from Distressingly Unknown Accountant, which will likely also alienate me from English Major. Also, since he is besties with Octahedral Biochem Major, that relationship might be strained. They talk about everything, which would not bother me in the slightest, since I understand the relationship, but I wouldn't want to harm their friendship. If Unfortunate Biochem Boy stopped being as close to Octahedral Biochem Major, I would feel really bad. Although it's not likely to be a problem, the implications loom over me like an upcoming doctor's appointment. They probably won't find anything horribly wrong, but what if they do? So I stress.
See? See what happens when people get histories? Much better when the only thing shared by all parties is the fact that they live in the same flat, or know people who live in that flat.
Other things that I miss are the smell of british tobacco smoke (which is emitted by tabs, not cigarettes or the hookah that stunk up my whole house tonight, and is generally smelled when hanging out with my British friend), pizza places, chips, pasties again, public transport, and the lack of daytime rain. The close proximity of grocery stores like Aldi (where real food could be purchased for £1, or less than $2) and the fifty million news agents, supermarkets, and fruit and veg stands that populated the three blocks surrounding my flat are also sorely missed. I have to walk ten minutes up hills to get even to a (british-type) supermarket, found in the states as convenience stores attached to gas stations. These walks are not associated with any sort of commute. The cheapest grocery store is also the furthest away, of course.
I also miss drinking and dancing. Parties big enough to have drinking games are full of strangers that only want to play pong and who don't want to dance and parties small enough to want to play drinking games are populated by non-beer-drinkers. I miss the casual drinking, where you know that someone has got your back, even if they're just as drunk as you, and they won't leave you at the club. I miss the siren songs of dubstep and rave music pounding through my body as I relax in the anonymity of a club and allow my body to thrash around, not really caring if I can match the rhythm of the music or the person next to me.
I'll be investing in air freshener to ward off any hookah stink that might make its way into my room (although keeping my door shut has done wonders so far tonight) and possibly also investigating the potential of Richmond cigarettes, the smell of which I didn't mind in England and which I rather miss, although I'd need to be stealthy and not get addicted or make my clothes stink of the smoke. That being said, I probably won't. I'm spending most of my disposable income, of which there really is none, on food and booze lately.
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